Surrounded by hazy New Mexican desert, a shaggy 30-year-old, Dave, sits cross-legged in the sand holding a flask of peyote tea. He drinks the entire flask.

An ethereal magnolia dances in the wind. It sways and bows as its petals pirouette and its leaves sashay. As the magnolia laughs, tickled by the wind, it frees a petal.

I’m an astereotypical human being, and as such, I’m in essence normal. One irregularity of mine, however, is particularly astounding: I’m neither a-, mono-, or polytheistic.